Guys!! Perfect Places To Touch Your Woman And Drive Her Wild [EXPLICIT CONTENT]

Guys!!  Perfect Places To Touch Your Woman And Drive Her Wild [EXPLICIT CONTENT]

We all know which female body parts men most frequently like to explore, but there is more to her than a vagina, breasts and butt. The largest amount of nerve endings may be packed into those areas, but she has pleasure sensors all over her body, and getting her in the mood may be as easy as stimulating some of these often-neglected parts.

1. Hair

Maintaining their gorgeous locks isn’t the only reason women go to their hairstylists so often. The process of wash, cut, color, and styling can actually be quite a stress reliever. Running your hands gently through her hair is a surefire way to send tingles down her spine. Let your fingers massage circles from her temples to the nape of her neck and she’ll be putty in your hands.

2. Pelvis

Concentrating some affection on her pelvis is a great idea; however, you’ll have to resist the urge to slip down to her vagina while you’re so close. Like teasing her inner thighs, kissing and licking around her pelvis will excite her until she’s begging for more. Prolong the sensation by leaving the region to focus on another body part for a while.

3. Inner thighs

Touching her inner thighs without venturing into the vaginal area will make for an excellent tease that is sure to get her revved up. Use your hands and mouth to caress and kiss the insides of her thighs, getting excruciatingly close to her ultimate pleasure spot, but pulling back before going all the way.

4. Feet

Pulp Fiction taught us that rubbing the feet of another man’s wife may be an offense punishable by being thrown out a window, so the sensual appeal of a foot massage is obvious. There are few better ways to help her relax than to give her feet a good rub, especially if her job requires her to be on them all day. Do it right and grab some massage oil or lotion. Don’t forget to pay some attention to her toes, ankles and the sides of her feet too. Some women really enjoy having their toes sucked, but others find it repulsive, so asking first is a good idea before putting them in your mouth.

5. Ear Lobes

Touching, kissing and even lightly biting the earlobes of your woman will up the bliss factor for her. These delicate, soft lobes are very sensitive and most women thoroughly enjoy the sensation of having a man’s lips on them. You can nibble around the outside of the rest of her ear as well, but for courtesy’s sake avoid jamming your tongue inside her ear.

6. Palms of her hands

People often use their hands as tools to please their partners, but rarely do they consider the pleasure potential of stimulating the hands themselves. The palm of a woman’s hand is an innocuous spot to focus a little attention on without making people around you uncomfortable. Tracing your finger along her palm will give her delightful shivers and make you appear sensitive and attentive.

7. Behind her knees

This area is one that most men don’t think of when trying to stimulate a woman, but it is, in fact, quite sensitive. Gently caressing the back of the knee under her skirt while the two of you are in a public place will make her ready to get busy once you get home. Don’t forget to pay some more attention to this special spot once you’re alone too.

8. Small of her back

The best way to guide your woman through a crowd is to place your hand against the small of her back. This small gesture shows that you feel protective of her without being too pushy like an arm around the shoulder might be. When you’re alone, kissing or licking down her spine to end up with a kiss on the small of her back will get her heart racing.

9. Clavicle

A well-defined clavicle, or collarbone, can be very sexy on a woman. Why not show your appreciation for its beauty with your touch and kiss? Pay attention to this body part while she’s still fully clothed, unbuttoning her shirt just enough to reveal the clavicle and no further. You can always come back to it once the clothes have disappeared as well to remind her of the anticipation it created when you started there.

10. Nape of her back

Once you get to the nape of her neck, place a few light kisses there. In ancient Japan, the back of a woman’s neck was seen as very attractive by men since it was one of the few places not covered by clothing. In modern times, the nape of the neck is often neglected in favor of more obvious pleasure centers, but never underestimate the power of gentle touches and kisses from her hairline to her shoulders.

11. Everywhere else

Every inch of her body is covered with nerve endings that could be stimulated, but that doesn’t mean that she doesn’t have some no-go places. Some women can’t stand to have their faces touched, while others find it unbearable if their hands are tickled. As you explore, you’ll learn which places your touch has the best effect on and which you should avoid.

The Truth About Female Ejaculation

What is female ejaculation, where does it emanate from, and how do you know when you have one?
Female ejaculation isn’t a myth, but it may be an elusive phenomenon for some women because it is not widely or often discussed. In fact, many women feel embarrassed when it happens and think they’ve urinated on their partner or the bed. Until relatively recently, the medical community wasn’t sure either.
As late as the 1980s, most doctors who were aware of the phenomenon of women ejaculating assumed the fluid must be urine. As a treatment, they would recommend exercises to strengthen the pelvic muscles, such as Kegels. The truth is, many women do leak a little urine during sex and during other activities as well, like sneezing, coughing, or laughing (if you’ve had children, you know what I’m talking about!), but urine is not the same as female ejaculate.
The Composition and Origin of Female Ejaculate
Since 2000, an increasing number of researchers have suggested the liquid may come from the Skene's glands, which are located on the anterior wall of the vagina around the lower end of the urethra. But the truth is we simply don’t know where ejaculate comes from and it’s something that doctors and researchers will continue to study and learn more about over the coming years.
As far as the amount of ejaculate, a woman can release as little as a teaspoonful or a capful, yet some claim to “squirt” a great deal more than that. Some studies suggest that all women ejaculate when they reach orgasm, but instead of the fluid being released from the vagina, it is pushed back up into the bladder when the muscles are tightened post-climax. Hence, some women might experience retrograde ejaculate, while others ejaculate outside the body.
Can Female Ejaculation Be Taught? Female ejaculation is generally achieved by stimulating the G-spot, which is considered an erotic zone located internally, at the front of the vagina. This area is intimately connected with the urethra. Indeed, pressure on the G-spot area will invariably produce a desire to pee.

There is no doubt that pressing on the area of the G-spot would affect the above-mentioned Skene's glands. To experience its powers, find a position (such as man-from-behind or woman-on-top) that offers the right stimulation, friction, and deep penetration. Your partner will need to build up pressure on your G-spot as he thrusts, while either of you stimulates your clitoris at the same time. As you approach and reach orgasm, push out hard with your pelvic-floor muscles rather than squeezing in, as most women naturally do.

You can also use a sex toy, with or without the help of a partner. There are many made with a special curve known as a “G-spot stimulator.”
Not every woman can easily ejaculate, so don’t be disheartened if it doesn’t work as you expect. It may be more difficult for some because of your physical makeup, weak pelvic-floor muscles, inability to properly relax, etc. However, every woman has the biological anatomy to ejaculate — so it is possible, in theory, that if you pay attention to this very special body part you will reap the rewards.
Since your G-spot may not be accustomed to stimulation, you might have to work on it regularly to feel it begin to open and become sensitized to touch. You can create a G-spot stimulation ritual with your partner or on your own — or both!
Remember, practice makes perfect. Keep trying and just go with the flow to master this trick.

Are You Dating A Player? 15 Tell-Tale Signs

We all believe we will be able to spot him. Getting swept away is for those other, more naïve, girls. But the truth is a player can be that good. He has had years to perfect his skills, hone in on what women want, and give it to them in such small doses that they keep coming back for more. He is smart, handsome, and charismatic. He knows exactly what to say. Falling prey to his womanizing is easy. That is, unless you can spot the signs. He may not be doing all of these things, but if he is doing more than a few, you may have a player on your hands.
1. He comes on strong. There is instant chemistry. You both feel it. He must see you again soon. The texting begins almost immediately. The phone calls. Intimate conversations. Another date is scheduled within days, if not hours, of the first. He will not let you slip away, no matter how much you resist. And, usually, you do not.
2. It gets sexy quickly. Whether it is during the first conversation talk turns to sex, or on the first date, you can be pretty confident this guy is looking to get naked with you, and fast.
3. He pulls back, even disappears, as soon as things go well. So now you are hooked. The relationship you think you are building is moving along nicely. You enjoy each other’s company, the sex is amazing (after all, practice makes perfect and he has had plenty of it), and you are pretty sure he is The One. Then, out of nowhere, he puts on the brakes, and you are left scratching your head trying to figure out why, and what you did to cause this unwelcome outcome. Chances are, though, you never will.
4. You spend a lot of time analyzing what he says. He says he adores you, and loves being together. He texts that he misses you, and cannot wait to see you. But then when he does, the relationship never progresses. Sound familiar? If you need to analyze what he means, then he likely does not mean what he says. When a guy is truly interested in seeing only you, there will be no need to guess what his intentions are. They will be obvious.
5. His words do not match his actions. He makes promises he does not keep. He talks about the future, even in the short term, but never follows through. If you try to pin him down for plans more than a week in advance, you will find yourself standing on shaky ground, never being sure such arrangements will come to pass until you are in the midst of them.
6. He makes it seem like you are crazy. If you are actually brave enough to confront him about his inconsistent relationship talk, he will look at you as though you are certifiable. Surely he has made his intentions known to you over and over again. In his mind he has covered himself and, in a way, he has. Believe a guy when he says he does not want to commit to you. The romanticism he exhibits is all about living in the moment, or re-enacting a fantasy, but, rest assured, reality will rear its ugly head sooner rather than later. The only thing that makes you crazy is coming back for more.
7. Relationship is a dirty word. Want to be a buzz kill? Just ask a player where your relationship is headed, and you will likely see him head for the door. Of course you have a relationship. You are just not in one.
8. You never meet his friends or family. You may feel like you know them because he speaks about them constantly. You know what they do, what they say, and what they like, but you do not know them personally. When a guy wants to integrate you into his life, he will introduce you to those who are special to him. He will want to show you off. If he keeps you isolated, it is not because he wants you all to himself. It is more likely he compartmentalizes because there are other women in his life besides you.
9. He is still online. If he still maintains an online dating profile or profiles, and remains active on them long after you start sleeping together, long after you make your relationship objectives known, it may be time to consider other options. If it is monogamy you seek, and the guy you are seeing is not interested in offering that, it is probably smart to re-evaluate and move on. Waiting for someone to change should never be a consideration. Be clear to him and to yourself about your goals. Otherwise, you may never find what you are looking for.
10. He refers to you as a friend. A guy who is serious about you will make you his girlfriend. He will want you and the rest of the world to know you are unavailable to any other man. If he refers to you as a friend, both in private and in public, he is letting you and everyone else know his options are still open.
11. Most of his friends are women. Not only are most of his frie nds women, they too are referred to as friends. Casual conversation does nothing to reveal whether or not he is having or has had a sexual relationship with any of these friends, and you are deliberately left wondering what makes you any more special than the others. Likely you are not.
12. He brags about his sexual history. There have been many women in his past, and he is not shy about informing you of his sexual conquests and why these endless attempts at a relationship failed, no doubt due to every reason apart from him.
13. He has a poor track record for commitment. What better indicator of future behavior than past behavior? If the guy you are seeing has been dating for two or three decades and has yet to experience a monogamous relationship that outlasts the change of four consecutive seasons, it is wise to question whether he can or will want to offer you the commitment you desire. Though there are exceptions to every rule, and people can and do change, the odds are not stacked in your favor.
14. There is no such thing as goodbye. No matter how many times either of you call it quits, say your goodbyes, and wish each other well, somehow he always manages to reappear, waving a flag (a red one, if I may) via a text, an email, or an article he innocently forwards along, implying he is around if you want him to be. Never promising more, only toying with your emotions, making you wonder whether this time things will be different. The problem is, they never are. At some point it comes time to recognize the cycle, and break it.
15. Your gut tells you so. Women’s intuition is real. Trust it. If you think your guy is a player, chances are it is you who is being played. Game over.

6 Things You Need to Know About Lubricants

More than half of men and women have used lubricants during sex.

More than half of men and women have used lubricants during sex.

Sex reduces stress, relieves pain, and that after-sex glow even makes you look younger. You can take advantage of these and other health benefits of sex while maximizing your pleasure by using a lubricant. In fact, women who used lubricants during sexual activity had more pleasurable and satisfying sex, according to a 2009 Indiana University study.
“Lubricants are chosen by many couples to enhance sexual pleasure by decreasing friction and irritation,” says Matthew Wosnitzer, MD, urologic surgeon specializing in male infertility, and instructor at Weill Cornell Medical College/New York-Presbyterian Hospital.
In fact, more than half of men and women have used lubricants during sex, according to two studies published in the Journal of Sexual Medicine.
Here are six things to consider before you use a lubricant, straight from the experts.
1. Pain Means Something. Lubricants often contain lidocaine and benzocaine to lessen discomfort, said Rachel Needle, PsyD, Center for Marital and Sexual Health of South Florida, and executive director of the Whole Health Psychological Center in Florida.
“However, these ingredients can dull or numb the skin and lower pain perception. But pain tells us if something is tearing in our body. This is important to know as someone can end up being hurt and because possible tears can increase the risk of transmission of STIs [sexually transmitted infections],” adds Dr. Needle.
2. Watch for Sugars. “I don’t think there’s a particular lubricant that everybody should avoid, [but] there are some ingredients that affect women,” says Hilda Hutcherson, MD, associate dean for diversity and multicultural affairs at Columbia University College of Physicians and Surgeons and clinical professor of obstetrics and gynecology at Columbia Medical Center in New York City.

“For instance, glycerin, which is a sugar derivative, can cause increased yeast infections in women who are susceptible to yeast infections.” Lubricants with other sugars, like some flavored lubricants, can also be irritating for some women.

3. You Can Still Conceive. “The ideal lubricant is one which does not harm sperm and mimics the cervical mucus pH (acidity level) and consistency, and has antioxidants that may be helpful to sperm,” says Dr. Wosnitzer.
Pre-Seed lubricant is one of the few lubricants with clinical studies to support its safe use in couples trying to conceive, he adds.
4. Consider Your Sensitivity. “There are some lubricants that are warming, tingling that have menthol-like components and for some women that is extremely irritating,” says Hutcherson.
“For women who are not sure, I would say use a tiny bit on one side of your labia as a test; and if you find that it irritates, it burns, it’s uncomfortable, then don’t use any more of it,” says Hutcherson. “Never use something for the first time during intercourse. Test it before if you’re concerned that it might be an issue.” She recommends buying a variety pack of lubricants with different ingredients and textures to determine which one works best for both of you.
5. Try Au Naturel. “People have certainly used coconut oil and other household oils — the biggest complaint being that you can’t use a condom when you have that kind of oil because it breaks down latex condoms. The other thing is it messes up your sheets,” says Hutcherson. If you do decide to use a household oil as a lubricant, be sure to use a non-latex condom, she adds.
“Petroleum-based lubricants like Vaseline and mineral oil are not really great to use internally as they take quite a while to get out of the system and can cause irritation,” says Needle. However, natural oil-based lubricants like vegetable oil or corn oil are safe, she says.

Want to go au naturel but not use household oils in the bedroom? Try drinking lots of water. “If you’re dehydrated you’re going to have difficulty making lubrication,” says Hutcherson.
6. It’s Totally Normal. Some people find that applying lubricants interrupts sex while others are worried about what their partner will think of them if they cannot lubricate on their own.
“I think that everybody needs to have lube — everybody is going to need it at some point and it’s not unnatural to need it," Hutcherson says. "Just make it available and on those days when you feel you need it just incorporate it into foreplay and don’t be afraid of it, and try different types. Have fun with it

Is it Healthy to Have Sex During Menstruation?

That time of the month could be a great time for sensual enjoyment.

Having sex on your period is absolutely safe. The myth that it’s dangerous originates largely from religious texts. Many people wrongly believed that women were “dirty” or “unclean” while menstruating, and for this reason, contact with menstruating women was limited or forbidden entirely. In fact, some religions still adhere to these practices; however, medically and secularly speaking, there is no reason not to have sex on your period.
In fact, sex while you are menstruating can help ease the symptoms of premenstrual syndrome, or PMS. Many women say that orgasms can ease their cramps and the orgasmic contractions of the uterus offer a soothing internal massage. Also, orgasms release endorphins, natural painkillers and mood enhancers, which can help soothe the cramps, headaches, mild depression, and irritability sometimes associated with periods. Many women enjoy sex more when they are menstruating because of increased feelings of fullness in the pelvic and genital areas, which offer a head start on arousal.
There is one caveat, though: Safe sex is even more crucial during your period. Your risks of sexually transmitted diseases and infections are higher than normal during this time because the cervix opens to allow blood to pass through. Unfortunately, this creates the perfect pathway for bacteria to travel deep inside the pelvic cavity. You are also more likely to pass on blood-borne diseases like HIV and hepatitis to a partner during your period and more likely to develop yeast or bacterial infections because the vagina's pH during menstruation is less acidic. Finally, there is still a chance that you could get pregnant during your period (unless you're on the pill), so don't assume it's safe to forgo contraception.
Here are some tips to have safe, enjoyable sex during your period:
No muss, no fuss. If you are worried about staining your sheets, you can lay a towel down underneath you. You can also take things to the bathroom and have sex in the shower or the bathtub. Not only will it be a sensuous and exciting change from the norm, but it will also help to wash any blood away.

Try other activities. If you aren’t in the mood for intercourse, don’t give in to pressure. However, you can still reap the feel-good benefits of orgasm through masturbation. You can even enjoy oral sex during your period; it’s perfectly safe and healthy — although, as I said above, it’s very important to practice safer sex techniques (like using a dental dam).

Maintain your sex appeal. Sometimes when that time of the month rolls around, all you want to do is throw on your old sweats, lie on the couch, and gorge on feel-good snacks like ice cream and brownies. Unfortunately, foods such as these will only serve to make bloating and cramps worse, and lead to lethargy that will only add to your bad mood. Instead, commit to maintaining your sex appeal during your period. Some women claim that they feel sexy and powerful during their periods, so tap into that side of yourself and go out for a night of dancing. Getting active will help to keep your mind off your cramps, and your partner won’t be able to resist your sensual moves.
Remember, your period doesn’t have to slow down your sex life!

How to Find Lasting Love

Dating Tips for Finding the Right Person

                                                 
A healthy, loving relationship can enhance many aspects of your life, from your emotional and mental well-being to your physical health and overall happiness. For many of us, though, finding someone we want to share our lives with can seem like an impossible task. But don’t despair, even if you have a history of relationships that don’t last or if you feel burned out by traditional and online dating, you can still learn how to find lasting love.

Obstacles to finding lasting love

Life as a single person offers many rewards, including learning how to build a healthy relationship with yourself. However, if you’re ready to share your life with someone and want to build a lasting, worthwhile relationship, life as a single person can also be very frustrating.
Finding the right romantic partner is often a difficult journey, for several reasons. Perhaps you grew up in a household where there was no role model of a solid, healthy relationship and you doubt that such a thing even exists. Or maybe your dating history consists only of short, abrupt relationships where you or your partner gets bored too soon, and you don't know how to make a relationship last. You could be attracted to the wrong type of person or keep making the same bad choices over and over, due to an unresolved issue from your past. It's also possible you're not putting yourself in the best environments to meet the right person, or that when you do, you don't feel confident enough to approach someone. Whatever the case may be, it's important to believe that a healthy romantic relationship for you exists in the future.
It's also important to recognize that relationships are never perfect and always require lots of work, compromise, and a willingness to resolve conflict in a positive way. To find and build any relationship worth keeping, you may need to start by re-assessing some of your misconceptions about dating and relationships that can prevent you from finding lasting love:

Common Myths About Dating and Looking for Love
Myth	Reality
“I can only be happy and fulfilled if I’m in a relationship.” or “It’s better to have a bad relationship than no relationship.”	While there are health benefits that come with being in a healthy relationship, many people can be just as happy and fulfilled without being part of a couple. Despite the stigma in some social circles that accompanies being single, it’s important not to enter a relationship just to “fit in.” Being alone and being lonely are not the same thing. Nothing is as unhealthy and dispiriting as being in a bad relationship.
“If I don’t feel an instant attraction to someone, it’s not a relationship worth pursuing.”	This is an important myth to dispel, especially if you have a history of making inappropriate choices. Instant sexual attraction and lasting love do not necessarily go hand-in-hand. Emotions can change and deepen over time, and friends sometimes become lovers—if you give those relationships a chance to develop.
“Women have different emotions than men.”	Women and men feel similar things but sometimes express their feelings differently, often according to society’s conventions. But both men and women experience the same core emotions such as sadness, anger, fear, and joy.
“True love is constant.” or “Physical attraction fades over time.”	Love is rarely static, but that doesn’t mean love or physical attraction is doomed to fade over time. As we age, both men and women have fewer sexual hormones but emotion often influences passion more than hormones, and sexual passion can become stronger over time.
“I’ll be able to change the things I don’t like about someone.”	You can’t change anyone. People only change if and when they want to change.
“I didn’t feel close to my parents, so intimacy is always going to be uncomfortable for me.”	It’s never too late to change any pattern of behavior. Over time, and with enough effort, you can change the way you think, feel, and act.
“Disagreements always create problems in a relationship.”	Conflict doesn’t have to be negative or destructive. With the right resolution skills, conflict can also be an opportunity for growth in a relationship.

Expectations about dating and finding love

When we start looking for a long-term partner or enter into a romantic relationship, many of us do so with a predetermined set of (often unrealistic) expectations—such as how the person should look and behave, how the relationship should progress, and the roles each partner should fulfill. These expectations may be based on your family history, influence of your peer group, your past experiences, or even ideals portrayed in movies and TV shows. However, retaining many of these unrealistic expectations can make any potential partner seem inadequate and any new relationship feel disappointing.

Consider what's really important when looking for love

What feels right to you?

When looking for lasting love, forget what looks right, forget what you think should be right, and forget what your friends, parents, or other people think is right, and ask yourself: Does the relationship feel right to me?

The first step to finding a suitable partner is to distinguish between what you want and what you need in a partner. Wants are negotiable, needs are not. Wants include the things you think you'd like in a partner, including occupation, intellect, and physical attributes such as height, weight, and hair color. Even if certain traits may appear to be crucially important to you at first, over time you'll often find that you've been needlessly limiting your choices. For example, it may be more important, or at least as important, to find someone who is:

• Curious rather than extremely intelligent. Curious people tend to grow smarter over time, while those who are bright may languish intellectually if they lack curiosity.
• Sensual rather than sexy.
• Caring rather than beautiful or handsome.
• A little mysterious rather than glamorous.
• Humorous rather than wealthy.
• From a family with similar values to yours, rather than someone from a specific ethnic or social background.

Needs are different than wants in that needs are those things that matter to you most, such as values, ambitions, or goals in life. These are probably not the things you can find out about a person by eyeing them on the street, reading their profile on a dating site, or sharing a quick cocktail at a bar before last call.

What is a healthy relationship?

A healthy relationship is when two people develop a connection based on:

• Mutual respect
• Trust
• Honesty
• Support
• Fairness/equality
• Separate identities
• Good communication
• A sense of playfulness/fondness

Source: UW Seattle

Dating tips to help you find love #1: Keep things in perspective

• Don’t make your search for a relationship the center of your life. Concentrate on activities you enjoy, your career, health, and relationships with family and friends. When you focus on keeping yourself happy, it will keep your life balanced and make you a more interesting person when you do meet someone special.
• Remember that first impressions aren't always reliable. Especially when it comes to Internet dating, people don’t always accurately portray themselves. Regardless of where or how you meet someone, though, it always takes time to really get to know that person. You have to experience being with someone in a variety of situations, some good and some not so good, before you really know him or her. For example, how well does this person hold up under pressure when things don't go well or when they're tired, frustrated, or hungry?
• Be honest about your own flaws and shortcomings. Everyone has a flaw—or several—and, for a relationship to last, you want someone to love you for the person you are, not the person you’d like to be, or the person he or she thinks you have the potential to become. In many cases, what you consider a flaw may actually be something another person finds quirky and appealing. By being honest and shedding all pretense, you’ll encourage the other person to do the same, which can lead to a fulfilling relationship.
• Invest in a vertical relationship before you invest in a horizontal relationship. Don't be too quick to make a relationship sexual as it often becomes harder to develop a good vertical relationship afterwards. Even though it can be difficult in this day and age, try to take your time to get to know someone first. It will only lead to a more satisfying sexual relationship down the road.

Dating tips to help you find love #2: Put a priority on having fun

Online dating, singles events, and matchmaking services like speed dating may prove successful and enjoyable for some people, but for many they lack spontaneity and often feel more like high-pressure job interviews than fun social occasions. And whatever dating experts might tell you, there is a big difference between finding the right career and finding lasting love.
Think of your time as a single person as a great opportunity to meet new people, expand your social circle, and participate in new events. Instead of scouring dating sites or hanging out in pick-up bars, find and participate in activities that interest you. Make your focus having fun, whatever that means to you. You don’t have to be the life of the party or be endlessly cracking jokes to have fun. But by pursuing activities you enjoy and by putting yourself in a new environment, it's likely you'll meet new people who share similar interests and values. By focusing on simply having fun, even if you don’t meet that special someone, you will still have enjoyed yourself and maybe forged new friendships as well.
Here are some tips to find fun activities and like-minded people:

• Volunteer for a favorite charity, animal shelter, or political campaign. Or even try a volunteer vacation (for details see Resources section below).
• Take an extension class at a local college or university.
• Sign up for dance classes, cooking classes, or art classes.
• Join a running club, hiking group, cycling group, or sports team.
• Join a theater group, film group, or attend a panel discussion at a museum.
• Find a local book group or photography club.
• Attend local food and wine tasting events or art gallery openings.
• Be creative: Write a list of activities available in your area and, with your eyes closed, randomly put a pin in one, even if it’s something you would never normally consider. How about pole dancing, origami, or lawn bowling? Getting out of your comfort zone can be rewarding in itself.

Dating tips to help you find love #3: Learn to handle rejection gracefully

At some point, everyone looking for love is going to have to deal with rejection—both as the person being rejected and the person doing the rejecting. Some people can be overcome with anger, embarrassment, or anxiety when faced with rejection, or are so frightened of it happening again, they avoid dating or starting new relationships. Others find it so difficult to reject another person, they find themselves caught up in prolonged, unhealthy relationships.
By staying positive and being honest with yourself and others, handling rejection can be far less intimidating. The key is to accept that rejection is an inevitable part of dating but to not spend too much time worrying about it. It’s never fatal.

Tips for handling rejection when dating and looking for love

• Don’t take it personally. If you’re rejected after one or a few dates, the other person is likely only rejecting you for superficial reasons you have no control over—some people just prefer blondes to brunettes, chatty people to quiet ones—or because they are unable to overcome their own issues, such as a fear of commitment. Be grateful for early rejections in a relationship as it can spare you much more pain down the road.
• Don’t dwell on it, but learn from the experience. Don’t beat yourself up over any mistakes you think you made. If it happens repeatedly, though, take some time to reflect on how you relate to others, and any problems you need to work on. Then let it go. By dealing with rejection in a healthy way it can increase your strength and resilience.
• Acknowledge your feelings. It’s often normal to feel a little hurt, resentful, disappointed, or even sad when faced with rejection. It's important to acknowledge your feelings without trying to suppress them. If you practice mindfulness, you’ll find that staying in touch with your feelings helps you quickly move on from negative experiences.

Dating tips to help you find love #4: Watch for relationship red flags

It's important to be aware of red-flag behaviors that may indicate a relationship is not going to lead to healthy, lasting love. In such cases, it's better to cut your losses early, rather than invest time in a relationship that isn't good for you or the other person. Trust your instincts and pay close attention to how the other person makes you feel. If you tend to feel insecure, ashamed, or undervalued, it may be time to reconsider the relationship.

Common relationship red flags:

• The relationship is alcohol dependent. You only communicate well—laugh, talk, make love—when one or both of you are under the influence of alcohol or other substances.
• There’s trouble making a commitment. For some people commitment is much more difficult than others. It's harder for them to trust others or to understand the benefits of a long-term relationship because of previous experiences or an unstable home life growing up.
• Nonverbal communication is off. Instead of wanting to connect with you, the other person’s attention is on other things like his or her phone or the TV.
• Jealousy about outside interests. One partner doesn’t like the other spending time with friends and family members outside the relationship.
• Controlling behavior. There is a desire on the part of one person to control the other, stop him or her from having independent thoughts and feelings.
• The relationship is exclusively sexual. There is no interest in the other person other than a physical interest. A meaningful and fulfilling relationship depends on more than just good sex.
• No one-on-one time. One partner only wants to be with the other as part of a group of people. If there’s no desire to spend quality time alone with you, outside of the bedroom, it can signify a greater issue.

Dating tips to help you find love #5: Deal with trust issues

Mutual trust is a cornerstone of any close personal relationship. If there is no trust in a relationship, it's impossible for you to feel safe and cared for by another person, or to make that person feel safe and cared for. In other words, without trust, lasting love can never blossom. Of course, trust doesn’t develop overnight; it develops over time as your connection with another person deepens and you learn more about each other. However, if you're someone with trust issues—someone who's been betrayed, traumatized, or abused in the past, or someone with an insecure attachment bond—then you may find it impossible to trust others and find lasting love.
When you’re unable to trust others, your romantic relationships will be dominated by fear—fear of being betrayed by the other person, fear of being let down, or fear of feeling vulnerable. But it is possible to learn to trust others. By working with the right therapist, you can identify the source of your mistrust and explore ways to build trust in existing and future relationships.

Therapy for trust issues

The key to overcoming trust issues in your personal relationships is to work with a therapist you feel comfortable talking to, someone who will be your partner in overcoming the problem. Obviously, having trust issues can make finding a therapist you trust and feel comfortable with difficult, but for many people the therapy process can be the ideal way to learn to trust again.
Don’t be discouraged if you think therapy is inaccessible or too expensive. Group therapy may be more affordable than individual therapy and can be just as effective at dealing with trust issues. In fact, having more people present means there are more opportunities for you to practice developing trust. Alternately, some individual therapists will accept sliding scale payments where you pay what you can afford for each session, while some community organizations offer therapy at discounted rates. To learn more, read: Finding a Therapist Who Can Help You Heal.
Learning to develop trust is a process, but with the right help you can be rewarded with richer, more fulfilling relationships and the chance to find lasting love.

Dating tips to help you find love #6: Nurture your budding relationship

Remember that finding the right person is just the beginning of the journey, not the destination. In order to move from casual dating to a committed, loving relationship, you need to nurture that new connection. It's a process that requires time, effort, and a genuine interest in the other person as a whole. It also requires an openness to compromise and change.
All relationships change over time. You’ll change over time, your partner will change, and so will both of your needs and expectations. What you want from a relationship at the beginning may be very different from what you and your partner want from that same relationship a few months or years down the road.
For a romantic relationship to blossom into lasting love you need to be willing and able to:

• Invest in the relationship. No relationship will run smoothly without regular attention, so ask yourself if you are willing to invest the time and effort into this relationship. Often, after the initial blush of romance has faded, couples switch off from one another, but the more you invest in each other, the more you grow to care. Find things you enjoy doing together and commit to spending the time to do them, even when you’re busy or stressed.
• Communicate openly. Is your partner genuinely interested in your thoughts and feelings? Are you comfortable expressing your own opinions, thoughts, and feelings around this person? Are you playful, open, and able to laugh together and enjoy each other's company? Your partner is not a mind reader, so tell him or her how you feel. When you both feel comfortable expressing your needs, fears, and desires, the bond between you will become stronger and deeper.
• Resolve conflict by fighting fair. Some couples talk things out quietly, while others may raise their voices and passionately disagree. No matter how you approach the differences in your relationship, the important thing is that you aren't fearful of conflict. You need to feel safe to express the things that bother you without fear of retaliation, and to be able to resolve conflict without humiliation, degradation, or insisting on being right.
• Accept change. Every relationship changes and goes through good and bad periods, but overall a healthy relationship should continue to be good for you. It should bring the best out in you and should not only make you happier, but also make you a better person: kinder, more empathic, and more generous.

Advice for Building Relationships that are Healthy, Happy and Satisfying

                                                
A strong, healthy relationship can be one of the best supports in your life. Good relationships improve all aspects of your life, strengthening your health, your mind, and your connections with others. However, if the relationship isn't working, it can also be a tremendous drain. Relationships are an investment. The more you put in, the more you can get back. These tips can help keep a healthy relationship strong, or repair trust and love in a relationship on the rocks.

How to strengthen your loving relationship

Everyone’s relationship is unique, and people come together for many different reasons. But there are some things that good relationships have in common. Knowing the basic principles of healthy relationships helps keep them meaningful, fulfilling and exciting in both happy times and sad:
What makes a healthy love relationship?

• Staying involved with each other. Some relationships get stuck in peaceful coexistence, but without truly relating to each other and working together. While it may seem stable on the surface, lack of involvement and communication increases distance. When you need to talk about something important, the connection and understanding may no longer be there.
• Getting through conflict. Some couples talk things out quietly, while others may raise their voices and passionately disagree. The key in a strong relationship, though, is not to be fearful of conflict. You need to be safe to express things that bother you without fear of retaliation, and be able to resolve conflict without humiliation, degradation or insisting on being right.
• Keeping outside relationships and interests alive. No one person can meet all of our needs, and expecting too much from someone can put a lot of unhealthy pressure on a relationship. Having friends and outside interests not only strengthens your social network, but brings new insights and stimulation to the relationship, too.
• Communicating. Honest, direct communication is a key part of any relationship. When both people feel comfortable expressing their needs, fears, and desires, trust and bonds are strengthened. Nonverbal cues—body language like eye contact, leaning forward or away, or touching someone’s arm—are critical to communication.

Relationship advice tip 1: Keep physical intimacy alive

Touch is a fundamental part of human existence. Studies on infants have shown the importance of regular, loving touch and holding on brain development. These benefits do not end in childhood. Life without physical contact with others is a lonely life indeed.
Studies have shown that affectionate touch actually boosts the body’s levels of oxytocin, a hormone that influences bonding and attachment. In a committed relationship between two adult partners, physical intercourse is often a cornerstone of the relationship. However, intercourse should not be the only method of physical intimacy in a relationship. Regular, affectionate touch—holding hands, hugging, or kissing—is equally important.
Be sensitive to what your partner likes. While touch is a key part of a healthy relationship, it’s important to take some time to find out what your partner really likes. Unwanted touching or inappropriate overtures can make the other person tense up and retreat—exactly what you don’t want.

Relationship advice tip 2: Spend quality time together

You probably have fond memories of when you were first dating your loved one. Everything may have seemed new and exciting, and you may have spent hours just chatting together or coming up with new, exciting things to try. However, as time goes by, children, demanding jobs, long commutes, different hobbies and other obligations can make it hard to find time together. It’s critical for your relationship, though, to make time for yourselves. If you don’t have quality time, communication and understanding start to erode.

Simple ways to connect as a couple and rekindle love

• Commit to spending quality time together on a regular basis. Even during very busy and stressful times, a few minutes of really sharing and connecting can help keep bonds strong.
• Find something that you enjoy doing together, whether it is a shared hobby, dance class, daily walk, or sitting over a cup of coffee in the morning.
• Try something new together. Doing new things together can be a fun way to connect and keep things interesting. It can be as simple as trying a new restaurant or going on a day trip to a place you’ve never been before.

Couples are often more fun and playful in the early stages of a relationship. However, this playful attitude can sometimes be forgotten as life challenges or old resentments start getting in the way. Keeping a sense of humor can actually help you get through tough times, reduce stress, and work through issues more easily.

Focus on having fun together

• Think about playful ways to surprise your partner, like bringing flowers or a favorite movie home unexpectedly.
• Learn from the “play experts” together. Playing with pets or small children can really help you reconnect with your playful side. If it’s something you do together, you also learn more about your partner and how he or she likes to have fun.
• Make a habit of laughing together whenever you can. Most situations are not as bleak as they appear to be when you approach them with humor.

Learning how to play again

A little humor and playful interaction can go a long way in relieving tense situations and helping you see the brighter side. If you’re feeling a little rusty, learn more about how playful communication can improve your relationship, and for fun ways to practice this skill.

Relationship advice tip 3: Never stop communicating

Good communication is a fundamental part of a healthy relationship. When people stop communicating well, they stop relating well, and times of change or stress can really bring out disconnect. As long as you are communicating, you can work through whatever problem you’re facing.

Learn your partner’s emotional cues

Each of us is a little different in how we best receive information. Some people might respond better to sight, sound, or touch. Your partner’s responses may be different from yours. Take some time to learn your partner’s cues, and be sure to communicate your own as well. For example, one person might find a brief massage after a stressful day a loving mode of communication—while another might just want to talk over a hot cup of tea.
So much of our communication is transmitted by what we don’t say. Nonverbal cues—such as eye contact, leaning forward or away, or touching someone’s arm—communicate much more than words. For a relationship to work well, each person has to be receptive to sending and receiving nonverbal cues. Learning to understand this “body language” can help you better understand what your partner is trying to say. Think about what you are transmitting as well, and if what you say matches what you feel. If you say “I’m fine,” but you clench your teeth and look away, then your body is clearly signaling you are not.

Question your assumptions

If you’ve known each other for a while, you may assume that your partner has a pretty good idea of what you are thinking and what you need. However, your partner is not a mind reader. While your partner may have some idea, it is much healthier to directly express your needs to avoid any confusion. Your partner may sense something, but it might not be what you need. What’s more, people change, and what you needed and wanted five years ago, for example, may be very different now. Getting in the habit of expressing your needs helps you weather difficult times, which otherwise may lead to increasing resentment, misunderstanding, and anger.

Use your senses to keep stress in check

If you’re not calm and focused, you won’t be able to communicate effectively. The best way to reduce stress quickly and reliably is through the senses. But each person responds differently to sensory input, so you need to find things that are soothing to you.

Relationship advice tip 4: Healthy relationships are built on give and take

If you expect to get what you want 100% of a time in a relationship, you are setting yourself up for disappointment. Healthy relationships are built on compromise, and it takes work on each person’s part to make sure that there is a reasonable exchange.

Recognize what’s important to your partner

Knowing what is truly important to your partner can go a long way towards building goodwill and an atmosphere of compromise. On the flip side, it’s also important for your partner to recognize your wants and for you to state them clearly. Constantly compromising your needs for others' will build resentment and anger.

Don’t make “winning” your goal

If you approach your partner with the attitude that things have to be your way or else, it will be difficult to reach a compromise. Sometimes this attitude comes from not having your needs met while you were younger, or it could be from years of accumulated resentment building up in your current relationship. It’s all right to have strong convictions about something, but your partner deserves to be heard as well. You are more likely to get your needs met if you respect what your partner needs, and compromise when you can.

Learn how to respectfully resolve conflict

Conflict is inevitable in any relationship, but to keep a relationship strong, both people need to feel they’ve been heard. The goal is not to win but to resolve the conflict with respect and love.

• Make sure you are fighting fair.
• Don’t attack someone directly; use “I” statements to communicate how you feel.
• Don’t drag old arguments into the mix.
• Keep the focus on the issue at hand, and respect the other person.

Relationship advice tip 5: Expect ups and downs

It’s also important to recognize that there are ups and downs in every relationship. You won’t always be on the same page. Sometimes one partner may be struggling with an issue that stresses them, such as the death of a close family member. Other events, like job loss or severe health problems, can affect both partners and make it difficult to relate to each other. You might have different ideas of managing finances or raising children. Different people cope with stress differently, and misunderstanding can rapidly turn to frustration and anger.

Relationship advice for getting through life’s ups and downs

• Don’t take out your problems on your partner. Life stresses can make us short tempered. If you are coping with a lot of stress, it might seem easier to snap at your partner. Fighting like this might initially feel like a release, but it slowly poisons your relationship. Find other ways to vent your anger and frustration.
• Some problems are bigger than both of you. Trying to force a solution can cause even more problems. Every person works through problems and issues in his or her own way. Remember that you’re a team. Continuing to move forward together can get you through the rough spots.
• Be open to change. Change is inevitable in life, and it will happen whether you go with it or fight it. Flexibility is essential to adapt to the change that is always taking place in any relationship, and it allows you to grow together through both the good times and the bad.
• Don’t ignore problems. Whatever problems arise in a romantic relationship, it’s important to face them together as a couple. If an aspect of the relationship stops working, don’t simply ignore it, but instead address it with your partner. Things change, so respond to them together as they do.

Romantic relationships require ongoing attention

Many couples focus on their relationship only when there are specific, unavoidable problems to overcome. Once the problems have been resolved they often switch their attention back to their careers, kids, or other interests. However, romantic relationships require ongoing attention and commitment for love to flourish. As long as the health of a romantic relationship remains important to you, it is going to require your attention and effort.

Debunking The "Soul Mate" Myth: If He Isn't The One, Look For Another One

I finally take off my wedding and engagement rings; this day has loomed large. I have worried and fretted and made plans about this day. Do I take off the rings when the divorce is granted? Or before? Do I wait?
I decided to wait. I wasn't ready to tell the world that I had no soul mate, no partner.
The removal of the wedding rings was a sign to the world, I thought, that I had no Prince Charming, indeed, he had ridden off, on his middle aged, token white horse, a while ago, leaving me and the children without money. Leaving me clambering to discover a new identity.
This is what the myth of a soul mate does to women. It robs us of our identity. It prevents us from discovering who it is that we really are. It makes us rely on others, on the supposed soul mate, to define us. To define our lives.
We are sold on the idea that there is one out there, "the one", who will love us, know us, share with us, cherish us, care for us, help us...
You know what? For most of us, there isn't.
And we clutch at men in our inexperience, in our eyes starred with soul mate lights, thinking his smile or his phoning or texting or even his not calling or texting ( see He's Just not That Into You) are signs that He Is The One.
We put our career second place to his. We move across country for his job, we tell our friends we can't see that movie for a girls' night tonight because he is tired and needs us, we try to cultivate interest in his hobbies, his pastimes, we see movies he loves. We smile at his jokes, and at his friends, friends with whom we have nothing in common, except him.
In believing the myth of a soul mate, we shut our eyes to glaring imperfections and we mask that niggle in our stomach with activity and smiles. Disdainfully we ignore our intuition and opt for believing that this is our soul mate, he who will be our all, he who will love us forever.
We believe in Snow White being rescued from that wicked stepmother. Intellectually, we laugh at such fantasy. Outwardly we mouth feminist ideologies. Deep down, however, we know, out there, someone is meant for us.
These fantasies are just that, fantasies. What's more, they prove to be a disservice to women, in encouraging us to believe that we need to find a soul mate. Believing this myth, we sell our soul to be who it is that the man we love wants us to be. We prevent ourselves from reaching our full potential. We are tough hard working career women but emotionally and secretly we know that his needs come first.
The myth of the soul mate has to stop. There may be someone out there for you but more likely there is a nice guy, someone you love but not someone for whom you should sell your soul. Someone who is not your be all and end all, your everything, but someone whom you
can love and who will love you. Someone who may be a part of your life but not your whole life.
There may, too, be no romantic interest for you, now or later. There may be good friends of both sexes. Giving up the myth of the soul mate frees us to make good friends, to explore varied interests and varied facets of ourselves.
Don't cover up yourself, who you are, your dreams and aspirations, for the supposed soul mate.
Build a life. Be who you are, a person with dignity.
And if someone comes along, allow him to be who it is that he is, without pressure from you to be a soul mate,
Don't let him pressure you either, to be his be all and end all.
Be you, that divorced mom. Wiser. Older. More fun, in love, with yourself and in love with life.

What Is Love? 10 Quotes To Help You Understand

What is love? What would you do for love? Is love really all we need?
According to Collective Evolution...
"Some common definitions of love found in the dictionary mention feelings of affection and attachment for another. Feelings of connectedness and goodwill, warm affection or devotion, sexual desire and attraction are also used to describe love. When you feel love it is hard to describe; it is a warm fuzzy feeling that just makes you do things you wouldn’t normally do.
One could argue that human beings have one sole purpose, that is to love and be loved. It seems we do many things that have underlying themes of love and affection, our primary motive of seeking some form of love and happiness. Is our desire to experience the ultimate feeling of love the most important theme of our lives? For many, somewhere deep inside of us is an insecurity, a feeling that we are not good enough. This feeling makes us do things in the hope that we will be loved."
Whatever it is for you love is, for sure, not simple. But, it's well worth the effort!

is He Just Not That Into You, Or Is He Emotionally Unavailable?

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Emotional availability in a relationship can sometimes seem as elusive as the Holy Grail. I know how precious this quality is and most definitely a part of the treasure I seek in a solid relationship.
Lately, I have been better able to look at those issues troubling me in a relationship as opportunities for introspection first before turning my gaze toward the other person. I might still conclude that someone is not the best match for me for various reasons. Yet now, if I know I have taken a good look at myself first, I feel more empowered about any observations I have about my date.
Emotional availability cuts both ways, of course, and I can see where I have work to do as well. Yet, at least I am aware of this! It would be great to find a man who is at least aware of emotional intelligence and who is willing to work on emotional availability alongside me.
Of course, as a divorced person, I do have to learn to trust again (and not blindly). But how the heck am I supposed to do that? The only information I have come across that makes sense in the real world is to use the old principle of “test, trust, test, trust, test, trust.”
This involves consciously testing the waters in a new relationship and putting myself out there just a little bit to see what happens. If, after each milestone of “testing the waters,” my partner seems demonstrably trustworthy, then it is incumbent upon me to try to open up a little bit more each time and experiment with being fully present in the relationship, stitched up heart and all.
In the testing phase there are definite signs to watch out for, both in your date as well as in yourself. Using your own feelings as a guide, here are eight you might experience when dating an emotionally unavailable man, keeping in mind some of what you feel may be a function of your own emotional unavailability, too.
1. You feel dismissed or ignored. He always has something on his mind or seems distracted by work and other priorities. (Question: Is he really dismissing you, or do you fear that he is?)
2. You feel cut off or that you can’t say everything you would like to say. He cuts short more meaningful conversations (as though uncomfortable). He doesn’t seem to want to hear about the unsexy parts of your life. (Question: Is he the uncomfortable one or are you uncomfortable with discussing the areas of your life that make you feel more vulnerable?)
3. You feel he comes on too strong. He is too quick to flatter or seems to skip ahead and talk about your relationship like you have been going out longer than you have, yet he doesn’t outright say things like, “I want us to be exclusive. Please tell me how you feel,” or “I am ready to commit to this relationship and see where it goes. How do you feel?” The key here is the dialogue and interest in what you have to say. (Question: Is he really coming on too strong or are you scared because he likes you so much? Are you ready to receive love?)
4. Mixed messages. You feel confused. He says one thing and does another. He comes on strong, then retreats. Sometimes this is just crossed wires between the two of you. If so, this is a good opportunity to try to clarify what confuses you. But if you do this more than once and are still left with this feeling, then it could be his chronic pattern. (Question: Are wires crossed due to his behavior and chronic lack of clarity and consistency, or are you trying too hard to read between the lines and predict outcomes thereby stressing yourself out unnecessarily?)
5. You feel like he has hidden a message in a comment and it feels puzzling. You don’t know what to make of it. There is a saying that goes, “People always tell you who they are.” If he says he “isn’t good with emotional stuff” or expression, believe him. He’s not saying this for nothing. (Question: Do you believe him? He just told you who he is in plain language. If you want him to clarify what you think he just said, ask him if what he said is true and see if he will elaborate.)
6. A sense he is holding something back. He seems secretive, vague or makes excuses. You feel uneasy. (Question: Is he vague or is this a communication issue presenting you with a good opportunity to practice your communication skills? Ask again. If he is still vague, then you have more data.)
7. You feel he has gotten less interested in you now that he is sure of your interest in him. Some men just like the chase and run as soon as they catch you. This is not a good sign and the minute you pursue him (because he seemed so interested), you have lost him forever. His interest is in the conquest only. Either play a stressful, tiresome game of always being slightly unavailable and slightly disinterested or accept that he’s a chronic conquistador and move on. (Question: Is he clearly less interested as in not contacting you, or are you merely fearful that he is not interested because your feelings for him freak you out?)
8. You feel he is uncompromising and critical. Perfectionism is another form of control. His need for perfection can go hand in glove with a distaste for the messy part of love and life. Basically, perfectionism is a socially acceptable form of addiction and escapism and addiction and escapism make it hard for anyone to face real life and a real relationship in all its messy glory. (Question: Is he really critical of imperfection or are you fearful of not being perfect?)
There are no right or wrong answers and you are not a bad person if you find out (by asking yourself the above questions) that you might have to monitor your own ability to be fully available. If you see that you might have some work to do, then this is good news. You may have just discovered what has been holding you back! Likewise, if your man fits the above patterns of emotional unavailability and seems unaware of this fact and unwilling to work on his stuff, go find someone else. You deserve someone who is fully there for you.

15 Ways To Succeed At Single Parent Dating

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15 Ways To Succeed at Single Parent Dating
Everyone knows that dating is complicated, even under the best of circumstances. Add children into the picture, and things can get doubly complex. That doesn’t even take into account angry (or absent!) exes, or family and friends who feel the need to share their opinions about how, and who, you should date.
But complications need not keep you from dating successfully. Careful planning and wise decision-making can lead to an enjoyable dating life—and who knows, maybe even the fabulous partner you’ve been looking for!
Our friends at eHarmony want your experience in dating after divorce to be as successful as possible. Here are their 15 thoughts to consider when jumping back into the dating pool as a single parent:
1. Ensure safety first. Naturally, your child’s safety is priority number one. So enlist the help of your mother or most reliable babysitter. This is for your benefit, too, so you can relax and enjoy your date without worrying.
2. Be upfront about your status. It isn’t always easy to bring up the fact that you have kids when considering going out with someone new. But it’s best to put it out there from the get-go and avoid surprises later on.
3. Carefully consider potential partners' interest in family matters. If you’re attracted to someone who isn’t interested in a lifestyle that includes a child, but expects you to fit into his childless lifestyle, this scenario has “red flag” written all over it.
4. Don't bring a parade of potential partners through your kids' lives. Be selective who you date and especially selective about who you bring into your children’s lives.  Remember they form relationships, and experience break-ups, with your partners, too.
5. Be cautious about social media. Don’t post information about your children on your dating profile. This includes photos of you with your children or information about them, including names, ages, or where they go to school.
6. Get ready to be flexible. Kids’ needs won’t fit neatly into your dating agenda. If you’re going to date, you’ll need patience, adaptability, and improvisation.
7. Understand that kids will be the priority - for both adults. It can be frustrating when you have to cancel a date (maybe for the third time) because a child is sick or needs help with homework. It’s part of the deal.  And the same goes for any potential partner and his kids, too. Be understanding if he is the one who needs to bail on you.
8. Realize that kids have their own emotional agenda. When dating, it’s hard enough to sort through your own feelings.  Your kids’ feelings about their mom dating again can be even more confusing. Make sure you set aside time to listen carefully and honor those emotions.
9. Take your time. Rushing into a new relationship is not advisable under any circumstance, but especially when children are involved. If your romantic relationship gets serious, the next steps will greatly affect your child.
10. Err on the side of caution when introducing a potential partner to your kids. Children may be fearful about what changes a new person in your life will bring, or they may get their hopes up about a permanent relationship. Either way, it’s best to wait for introductions until there is a commitment between you and your partner.
11. Do not put your child in the role of confidante. You can be open about your feelings without sharing information that is too sensitive or detailed. To process your thoughts and feelings, bend the ear of your best friend, sibling, or therapist.
12. Don't expect your kids' approval. Of course you want to have your children love the person you love, but (depending upon the child) he or she may not want to “share” you with someone else. There’s a fine balance between honoring your child’s wishes and honoring your own.
13. Be realistic. After introductions, be careful not to expect too much from your new relationship too soon. Someone who has never had kids will need plenty of time to develop his own relationship with your children.
14. Enjoy being more than a parent. As a single mom, being a parent is your most important job. But that is not all you are. It’s okay to think of yourself as a sexy, desirable, woman as well as a mom. Get a baby-sitter, relax, and treat yourself to an evening on the town.
15. Keep your dreams alive. You’re a parent forever, but you don’t need to be a SINGLE parent forever. Someone out there is going to love you—and your children—wholeheartedly.
Are you ready to date again? eHarmony is offering the DivorcedMoms community incredible savings of 75% off a 12 month membership. Just use Promo Code MOMS2015 - what are you waiting for?